"It's all about exposure, Jay. And pressing the flesh. But funny. Because I love people."

The race for Guhvahnar of Cullyforneeya is over. Ahnold triangulated in meritorious fashion. Phil Angelides is as inspiring as a dusty potted plant. Yawnsville. But we've now got a story from that race worth Googling or otherwise - Mary Carey's demanding equal time on Leno's horribly hackneyed "Tonight Show". I say give it to her. The woman's earned it. Have the Teddy Kennedys and Mitch McConnells of the current political class "lost weight, replaced their teeth, and gotten new breast implants" for us - the American people? Well, maybe McConnell. That bitch will do anything to get elected. Kinda like the kid that will eat anything for a dollar. Nonetheless, gotta give Carey her due, Jay. Have Charlie Sheen on the same show. That's pure chemistry. The snarky non-jokes write themselves, babe.

For those wondering of Maya's exploits with the Lutherans in the mornings during the week, let me just say that she's entirely happy there. We call it "school" and whenever we suggest to Maya in the morning that we go to school, she's in whole hog. There are certainly a few odd ducks in the mix, both kids and workers-wise. More mullets per capita than you'd imagined possible at this point in Civilization's march forward. But they do a dang fine job. One side note: I noticed the occasional depiction of comical Jesus playing with all the children of the World. Personally, I'd like to see a more multicultural mix with all the proper shout-outs to the World's religions. The Pope, Bob Marley, Tom Cruise - hell, everyone gets a cartoonish charicature in my agnostic middleground. Aside from that oversight, the Lutherans are doing just fine by Maya. Who, by the way, took a hardcore digger off her trike this morning when I was distracted by a quartet of Gawd Squad folks (ironic, isn't it...) coming up the street. Luckily, we weren't moving. Unluckily, Maya likes to steer even when we're standing still. In this instance, she lost her grip on the handlebars. Went down like an upended pot roast. Splat. Cut her lip a wee bit. Made me look like the World's Worst Dad. But got the evangelicals to keep on keepin' on down the Street. So it's sort of a lose-lose-win. Regardless, Maya rallied in no time with a bit of banana and some attention to her boo boo as the owner's manual suggested. Easy peasy in no time. The kid's a champ.

Hope your own tumbles are more comical than destructive today. Rock on.