Thursday, March 23, 2006

Today's Chef Special - L. Ron Hubbard Lawyer on a Shtick

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With all that's wrong in the World today (Google: "the Bush Administration) "South Park" offered a distraction last night in its Season Premiere. Crappy episode, written out of obvious spite and surprisingly devoid of truly obscene insult to the Age We Unfortunately Live In. But frickin' HILL-AIR-E-OUS! Issac Hayes got scewered like the only sea urchin at a vegan beachside BBQ. Comedy Central bowed to the lititgious pressure from Tom Cruise and his Mothership by not airing an episode concerning Scientology. Issac Hayes even quit to add heft to the Scientology pressure. No word yet on the previously sexy Anne Archer's reaction to the shtick - I always held a candle for her lingering hotness until I saw her ingratiating mug on a poster in the storefront window of the Scientology "Reading Room" in Santa Barbara. Nonetheless, everyone got their lawyers all up in a bunch and made it seem like Trey Parker and Matt Stone were offering up the cultural equivalent of calling Jesus a fag (remember - you heard it here first...but not really). So Parker and Stone puked out an episode that was equal parts personal and awkwardly funny. Kinda like my prom date. Who wins in all this? Who cares. But I'm sure a lot fewer 18-year-olds will make the horrible wrong turn into a Scientology-sponsored seminar in the years ahead. For that, I nominate "South Park" for the Nobel Piece of Mind Prize.

Hope your own adventurist departures today don't leave you on a valley floor, partially devoured by mountain lions and/or grizzly bears. Rock on.

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