Monday, January 09, 2006

The Day's newzie methane wafts freely

I'll try to connect what I feel to be the three most interesting newzie stories of the Day with the following bumpersticker - "If you buy the Cow, don't be suprised by the Crap." Actually, I'm not sure that it's a bumpersticker. Yet. Check back on that one.

"If you buy the Cow, don't be surprised by the Crap" ("IYBTCDBSBTC") Story Numero Uno - James Frey is full of crap. That's James Frey, of the recently reformed Oprah's Book Club, the author of "A Million Little Pieces" which became the second-best selling book of 2005 (even though it was originally published in 2003). The Smoking Gun has a typically sensational yet utterly insightful dump on Frey's book. I read it when it came out, and I'm not trying to out-cool anyone. Well, maybe I am. But in the interest of honest critique. The "memoir" describing Frey's astonishing abuse issues and the resulting treatment was entirely unorthodox and scary/funny. So...now it turns out to be mostly a load of crap. If you're familiar with Frey's Oprah-driven success, you need to read just what a fraud this guy is. But, if you buy the Cow...

"IYBTCDBSBTC" Story Numero, um, Two-oh - Samuel Alito is the least funny whiteguy in a country full of them. His opening statement on a day full of them at his Confirmation Hearings was more full of groaners than a nursing home fieldtrip bus rollover. Absolutely what I'd expected. Tomorrow, the crap may actually begin to fly. Check back for Maya's assessment.

"IYBTCDBSBTC" Story Numero C - Howard Stern debuted on the Sirius satellite network this morning and promptly emitted a healthy fog of blue material and promised that "the only limit is our (sic) mind" for the future. Don't get me wrong - I think Howard's a ballsy entertainer. But he's so low-ball he makes a pair of twos look like a full house. I'll wait for the stories on him featuring live sex acts before I give him credit for being newly tasteless. Until then, I'm still one of those mostly-NPR freaks downloading podcasts from elsewhere like a cynical cyborg when it comes to radio.

Hope your own "IYBTCDBSBTC" views of the world are methane-free. Rock on.

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